Do you rely on authority to lead? The more you rely on authority to lead the more authoritarian you are. Think of authoritarian leaders in the past. Do you want to follow in their footsteps? Relying on authority means using tools of authority, like what comes with your position in the organization, group, or family. Things like hiring, firing, promotions, bonuses, performance-based pay, giving or removing responsibility, perks, and so[…] Keep reading →

The insight below prompted spontaneous applause during a keynote talk I saw at a recent conference. The speaker, whose work brings him sometimes to the White House, was talking about principles of teaching, but you’ll see it applies to managing and leading too. He said he was talking to a teacher about creating assignments and test questions. Teachers perennially face challenges of creating problems that the students haven’t seen before[…] Keep reading →

Do you like feeling anxious? Would you prefer feeling excited to feeling anxious? Did you know that a doctor reading your vital statistics can’t tell the difference between you feeling anxiety and you feeling excitement? I looked it up and have a peer-reviewed paper somewhere confirming that—something like that the two emotions are physiologically concordant, or some academic-speak like that. The point is that your body reacts the same when[…] Keep reading →

Yesterday’s post on very basic but incredibly important instruction schools rarely teach reminded me of another. Everyone evaluates you on your posture Your posture conveys your mood—especially confidence—as much as anything, meaning people judge you on your posture. Maybe a smile, or lack thereof, counts for more. Most healthy people have total control over their posture. Since your emotions and behavior (I consider your body language and posture part of[…] Keep reading →

This lesson is so simple people don’t believe it. The title says it all. You don’t have to talk about what you don’t want to. People challenge it. I guess I should specify the context: casual conversation between people who don’t have authority over each other. At work or in court under oath may be a different story. How many times have you been in a boring conversation going nowhere[…] Keep reading →

Your world is man-made, nearly every part of it. Have you ever spent a day nature—even more than an hour? I don’t know about you, but I’ve slept almost every night of my life on a manufactured mattress with manufactured pillows and sheets. The nights I’ve camped I slept in a manufactured tent made of petroleum by-products, maybe space-aged materials!, on a similar mattress pad. Places like the Grand Canyon[…] Keep reading →

Why is “know thyself” hard? You’d think you’d know yourself better than anything. Here’s a major reason why: because almost everyone in the world benefits from you not knowing yourself. Because organizations mediate your interactions with everyone in the world except the dozen or so people closest to you and nearly all organizations benefit from you not knowing yourself. They benefit from manipulating you. Don’t believe me? Think of the most[…] Keep reading →