The pattern for developing a new social skill goes like:
1. Lack of awareness of something I want to change
2. Awareness of it
3. Realizing I can do something about it
4. Try do something about it but notice a day later that I missed the opportunity
5. Notice an hour later
6. Notice a minute later
7. Notice in the moment
8. Unconscious mastery
Advancing from one step to the next is just a matter of practice and time. If I don’t practice I don’t advance. If I don’t give it enough time I don’t advance. If I practice it’s only a matter of time until unconscious mastery.
I edited this from a response to a client on a question about behavioral change. I thought it simplified understanding a process many consider complex, which I think can simplify the process.
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