How learning sustainability is like learning sex
My books and courses get stellar reviews because they teach how to lead and take initiative effectively—not through lecture but through practicing the basics and advancing as we improve, sometimes to mastery. We learn all performance-based fields that way—sports, dance, music, military, and so on.
I approached coaching acting sustainably similarly. It hit me the other day that some things we don’t need structured learning for—things we love without any training and can pick up with practice. To learn them we need only start. We love indulging in the environment—walks in the woods, playing at the beach, watching a sunset or rainbow. I’ve now led hundreds, maybe over a thousand people to sample acting sustainably and the overwhelming majority enjoyed it. Most continued in some way without my motivating them.
Besides acting sustainably, sex also fits. We don’t need theory or structured practice to improve at sex. You can read all the books in the world for how to do it, but they won’t add up to just figuring it out the first time.
I wrote a few bullet points on how environmental stewardship is like sex. Sorry just to start with undeveloped bullet points, but I expect to develop the idea more. In the meantime, the view dramatically changes my approach to helping people act sustainably. Instead of thinking people need to practice the basics and develop skills, I see a lower bar of just facilitating a first magical experience, then to point to resources to improve themselves.
Learning sustainability is like learning sex:
- You can read all the books you want on technique for sex or the environment, the first time you do either you’ll make a mess. You improve with practice.
- Lots of books for sex and the environment on science, university courses, politicians and journalists talking about it. Mostly gets in the way of just doing either, though when you get it, you’ll want to research the science to improve your technique. The more you practice for sex or the environment, the more you’ll realize they haven’t practiced it enough to know how to do it. They’re probably trying to cover up their inadequacies by telling you what to do.
- With a little practice, you’ll be able to tell the scientists, academics, journalists, politicians, and activists how to do sex or the environment better.
- Technology might help for sex or the environment, but the more you use technology, the more you realize both sex and the environment are about connection and joy. The old ways tend to be the best ways for sex and the environment. If a technology pollutes the experience, probably best not to bring in another technology to fix it but to get rid of the polluting one.
- Deep down inside we’re wired for both sex and the environment. We love them. Moralizing and judgment gets in the way. Connecting with people and practice ennoble them.
- First time is hardest to make happen for sex or the environment, you get lots of advice, finally works. If you measure success by results, you’d fail.
- Also like becoming parent. In first moments of parenthood, you learn more than from reading all the books in the world. Once baby is born and you commit, opens life. Books are great resources after committing.
- Atheist and liberal view religion as imposing guilt on sex and the environment so get freedom. Religious and conservative view both as gifts from God, which brings them closer, to honor. I believe religious and conservative will soon overtake liberal, scientific as more active on stewardship.
- Both sensual, like food
- Might reach transcendent moment for sex or the environment but need not be goal oriented. Journey is destination.
- Once you get the right connection and technique for you, there’s no substitute.
- Measurement gets in the way for sex or the environment if you use it to judge, but inspiring if you use it for fun.
- Classes can help, but mostly practicing with person or people you like practicing with.
- You can do either alone, but not nearly as fulfilling.
- When either is off, life is off. Nothing works. But when either on, your feet don’t touch the ground. Everything is on. You can almost fly.
- Hard not to brag when either goes great. Worth it if it helps people you care about do it better.
- Uncomfortable talking to family about details and particular style, but eventually your parents will encourage you to more for sex and the environment.
- You’re going to get physically injured and emotionally hurt. We all do. It’s part of the path to mastery.
- When you get either working, it helps the other.
- People trying to sell you stuff for either probably trying to help themselves, not you.
- Government probably gets in the way. People know what works.
- When I hear old people saying, “I’m glad the youth will fix the problems we created” I hear someone missing out. I want old people like me as involved as young. We have more experience. We can do both better.
- The challenge is getting started for sex or the environment, which isn’t about creating motivation. We already love both. It’s about lowering barriers, support, and enough guidance that you don’t injure yourself.
- I’ve coached attraction, dating, and seduction. Like playing the piano or learning a sport, a little technique to get you started and feeling the joy, then pointing to resources once you’re off to the races. I also got a PhD in physics and an MBA. I coach stewardship now and I’ll tell you what works best and it’s not the science and business. I’m bringing you what works.
- My goal is not to motivate you. You already love stewardship, just society covered up your natural passion with its interests. To the extent you believed their hogwash, you twisted yourself up with mental gymnastics. My goal is to help you uncover that passion, uncontort your common sense, and enable your magical first time. You’ll naturally want to share the joy, fun, community, connection, meaning, and purpose you can get from either when not a science-based chore.
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