One of this blog’s central focuses is self-awareness because I think to improve your life and relationships the best starting point is to know where you are. Know thyself, in other words. Today I want to give you a way to learn deeply about how your mind works. I didn’t come up with the idea, but it intrigues me and I’d love to learn other people’s thoughts. I think people[…] Keep reading →

I grew up in an environment that took the concept of sins for granted. People called certain behaviors wrong by labeling them as “sins.” As a kid I never considered the sources of the classification or even if they corresponded to anything other than opinion. As a result, accepting someone calling a behavior as a sin seemed as natural as them saying something was green or wet or upside-down. As[…] Keep reading →

The other day I wrote about how annoying someone saying “Why are you getting hung up on just one word?” sounded. Then I noticed a friend using some other annoying words and phrases in conversation that sounded annoying and decided to share them here. I don’t think she realized how annoying she was. So I put a few more annoying things, not as a how-to, but for people who might[…] Keep reading →

I keep reading the phrase “jobs Americans wont’ do,” as in “illegal immigrants do work in jobs Americans won’t do.” Search on the phrases in quotes and you’ll find plenty of articles on the topic. Economists, politicians, and pundits use the tools they use to analyze jobs — labor supply and demand, wages, competition, and so on — to understand the situation. These articles never seem to question the existence[…] Keep reading →

I read that when considering officers for promotion, Napoleon would ask if the man was lucky. Napoleon responded “Give me lucky generals,” aware that “luck” comes to leaders who recognize opportunity and seize it. Consider all the words he could have used instead of luck. Louis Pasteur, pioneer of the Germ Theory of Disease, said “In the fields of observation chance favors only the prepared mind.” How do you reconcile[…] Keep reading →

Do you have more stuff than you want? Do you have trouble keeping yourself from acquiring it? Do you wish you could get less stuff? I’ve been working on getting less stuff for a long time. I find the most important part to not having too much stuff is not acquiring stuff in the first place. Often when I’m with people and they can see I want something but hesitate[…] Keep reading →

How do you feel right now? I suspect you read this page when you’re calm, maybe even relaxed. Now think about a few times you’ve been stressed. Think of how much you worried about the consequences of some worst-case scenario — how it could ruin your life, destroy some relationship, undermine something important to you. Did you yell at anyone? Lose your temper? Lose control in some other way? Everybody[…] Keep reading →

[This post is part of a series on Communication Skills Exercises for Business and Life. If you don’t see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you’ll get more value than reading just this post.] I’ve written a bunch of times on the exercise I made up to avoid using judgmental words, particularly good, bad, right, wrong, and evil, but also balanced, better,[…] Keep reading →

Here’s a conversation I had with a friend. It shows the way my physics training gets me to think that I expect others will find interesting. Remember, physics to me means respecting and appreciating nature — not just something that happens in a laboratory, but how rainbows work, why the sky is blue, and why people are the way we are. My friend also said she found the result enlightening.[…] Keep reading →