Leadership

Blog / Leadership / Tips

A model and strategy to lead people so they appreciate and thank you for being led

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Want to know a great way to lead people so they appreciate that you led them? Today's model and strategy show how. Often they'll thank you and look forward to being led again by you later. Note that it works when you and they both care about the goal. It may not work on projects that they have no internal motivation to work on. The first few times you do it, it may seem mechanical, but if you pay attention, you'll…

0 Comments
May 27, 2013
Awareness / Exercises / Leadership / Models / Tips

A model to think deeper

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Have you gotten to consider and tackle the important things in your life? Do some important issues still elude you? Do you still spend time in the unimportant parts of life? Or even when on the important parts, do the urgent fires take more of your time than you want? Urgency Importance Important, not urgent Important, urgent Unimportant, not urgent Unimportant, urgent Today's belief helps you get to those topics. A model to think more deeply: You think on the time…

0 Comments
May 19, 2013
Blog / Education / Entrepreneurship / Leadership

My Seminar on Leadership Through Emotional Intelligence and Self-awareness in four evening sessions starting June 17, 6:30pm-9:30pm in New York

I'll be leading the next session of my leadership seminar in New York in June. I'm experimenting as four three-hour evening sessions Session 1: Monday, June 17 Session 2: Wednesday, June 19 Session 3: Monday, June 24 Session 4: Wednesday, June 26 I'll give the same full attention I do for a weekend session. Sign up here. Here's the course description: What You'll Learn If you don't know how to lead, you can only do what you can do yourself. If you can lead, you can achieve anything anyone else did with a team. Even if you want only to live a quiet, happy, rewarding life you still have to lead yourself. The more you know how to lead, the more you are in control…

0 Comments
May 18, 2013
Awareness / Entrepreneurship / Exercises / Leadership / Models / Perception

A model to get more sales and to stay calm under pressure

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Do you want to get more sales? Even if you don't sell anything, you probably propose things, pitch things, apply for things, and so forth. Do you want to be more successful there and to close more? I learned today's model in sales class in business school, but it applies to many cases -- nearly any situation where you try to persuade someone of something nontrivial they have to agree to. Think of anything you bought for more than pocket change.…

2 Comments
May 16, 2013
Awareness / Blog / Leadership / Tips

A model to live like beautiful people do

[Today is the forty-second in a series on daily and weekly beliefs that improve my life and may improve yours, in no particular order. See the introduction to the series and the value of flexibility in beliefs for background.] People commonly believe that beautiful women have better lives than everybody else and that they have access to more valuable things. I came across that belief a lot when I used to go out dancing a lot. The evidence seemed overwhelming -- they automatically get invited to the best parties, they get past the doorpeople, men buy them drinks if the club doesn't already give them, and so on. In regular life, studies show attractive people get paid more, get promoted more, and so on. Sounds…

2 Comments
May 13, 2013
Awareness / Exercises / Leadership / Models

What happens when you change beliefs

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] The movie Moneyball and the book it's based on illustrate how new beliefs take root and can challenge and crowd out your old beliefs. Today's post is long, but the movie very well illustrates some stages and the emotional challenge of adopting a new belief, facing and overcoming resistance, and how it can lead to effective leadership and creating community. I'll quote enough of it here if you haven't seen the movie, but it was nominated for seven Oscars and stars…

0 Comments
May 6, 2013
A model that answers all of life’s most important questions
Awareness / Exercises / Leadership / Models

A model that answers all of life’s most important questions

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Answering all of life's most important questions is a tall order, but if you've read this web page long, you know the value I put on the Model, my model for human motivations and emotions. The Model forms the foundation of what I consider the best way to view and live life. A model that answers all of life's most important questions: The Model If you haven't read my series on the Model, I wrote about it at length. I put a…

0 Comments
April 30, 2013
Exercises / Leadership / Models / Tips

A model for direction in leadership and personal development

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] We are a social species. Most of what we care about in our environments are other people. Maybe I'm different than most people because I spent so much of my life not working on or valuing social skills -- a PhD in physics doesn't force you to learn social skills. Learning them later in life, I think I value them a lot more than I would have if I had them earlier in life. The social and leadership skills I've mastered…

0 Comments
April 29, 2013
Exercises / Leadership / Models

A model to promote responsibility

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Today's model polarizes. That is, it doesn't build consensus or bring people together. While building consensus and bringing people together may sometimes help in politics, if you want to stick to your values, you won't improve your life by living partly by your values while mixing in some other peoples' values you disagree with. So today's model will create a model that, for me at least, separates an embodiment of my values from its antithesis which, for me, helps me live…

0 Comments
April 28, 2013
A model to find the best in someone, including yourself
Art / Awareness / Exercises / Freedom / Leadership / Models / Tips

A model to find the best in someone, including yourself

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Today's belief helps overcome a challenge in helping someone's growth. It also helps you shine as a leader or mentor. When you lead or mentor someone or work to improve yourself, it helps to track progress, but you often can't. You can for external things, like how fast they run 100 meters, how they scored on a test, how much they increased revenues, etc. When you develop someone as a person, you can't always see the development externally. Especially with important…

0 Comments
April 23, 2013
Exercises / Leadership / Models

A model to rid your life of guilt and blame in favor of getting things done

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] Do you get that guilt and blame don't help your life but you can't stop yourself from blaming others sometimes and feeling guilty other times? Do you wish you could get over feeling guilty for things you can't change? Do you want to stop getting into arguments and losing friendships over blaming them? Today's model almost completely removed my habit of blaming others and of blaming myself, which led to guilt. I wrote about this topic at length about two years…

0 Comments
April 16, 2013
Exercises / Freedom / Leadership / Models / Tips

A model to allow yourself to fail, which gives you freedom to succeed

[Today is the fifth in a series on my daily and weekly beliefs, in no particular order. See the introduction to the series and the value of flexibility in beliefs for background.] Do you ever not do something for fear you'll fail at it? You've probably heard the phrase that the perfect is the enemy of the good. You may also have noticed that people who achieve greatness don't do things perfectly. How do you become great if you don't do everything perfectly? Here's a model I use to allow yourself to do something without worrying too much about failing -- ironically, the best way to succeed. It's one of my most important ones I think about almost daily. It fits with my practice of having…

0 Comments
April 6, 2013
Education / Exercises / Leadership / Models / Tips

Top models and strategies for negotiating

[This post is part of a series on "Mental models and beliefs: an exercise to identify yours." If you don't see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you'll get more value than reading just this post.] You negotiate every day. If you think you only negotiate when you're buying a car or creating a deal, you don't realize you negotiate every time you decide with a friend where to get lunch, with your spouse what movie to see, with your boss if you can work from home another day per week. Any interaction with some give and take involves negotiation. And if you think of negotiation as each of you trying to beat the other, you'll miss…

0 Comments
April 4, 2013
How not to overspend on things you don’t want
Blog / Entrepreneurship / Fitness / Leadership

How not to overspend on things you don’t want

I can't resist reposting a comment I posted on the forum of one of my favorite other blogs, Mr. Money Mustache. I'm reposting it because two other readers rated my response highly, one giving my response this animated image, making me proud. The post I responded to Alright mustachians [the term for people in the Mr. Money Mustache community who practice his principles of not spending money on stuff that doesn't improve your life] I need your sage advice. In the last three months I have really cut down on my bad habits. I pack my own lunch to work every day. I broke up with cable. I stopped ordering books from amazon on a regular basis. I changed my eating habits from quick and…

0 Comments
March 28, 2013
Blog / Leadership / Tips

What makes a world-class speech

I was watching the beginning of the movie Patton. If you haven't seen it, it begins with George C. Scott as General Patton giving an incredible speech. YouTube has only the audio, but here it is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9b5g1avyCSA Many see giving a speech like that as the pinnacle of leadership -- "I have a dream," the Gettysburg Address, Churchill's great speeches, and so on. If they are the pinnacle of leadership, I can't say, but they do showcase many of history's greatest leaders. So, those interested in leading may ask, how one gets to give such a great speech. Giving such speeches requires two elements -- the skill to deliver and the opportunity. Both come from one place. It may sound too simple and itself sound…

0 Comments
March 25, 2013
Blog / Education / Fitness / Leadership

More on John Wooden

I found a couple more videos on John Wooden, whom I wrote about yesterday. First, some thoughts on him by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, one of the top players of all time. He is the NBA's all-time leading scorer, with 38,387 points. During his career with the NBA's Milwaukee Bucks and Los Angeles Lakers from 1969 to 1989, Abdul-Jabbar won six NBA championships and a record six regular season MVP Awards. In college at UCLA, he played on three consecutive national championship teams, and his high school team won 71 consecutive games. At the time of his retirement, Abdul-Jabbar was the NBA's all-time leader in points scored, games played, minutes played, field goals made, field goal attempts, blocked shots, defensive rebounds, and personal fouls. Look at the…

0 Comments
March 23, 2013
Blog / Fitness / Leadership

A few minutes on one of the best leaders in U.S. history

While searching for videos on Lou Gehrig for yesterday's post, I happened on a short video on John Wooden, one of the great coaches of any sport. According to Wikipedia John Robert Wooden (October 14, 1910 — June 4, 2010) was an American basketball player and coach. Nicknamed the "Wizard of Westwood", he won ten NCAA national championships in a 12-year period—seven in a row—as head coach at UCLA, an unprecedented feat. Within this period, his teams won a record 88 consecutive games. He was named national coach of the year six times. As a player, Wooden was the first to be named basketball All-American three times and he won a national championship at Purdue. Wooden was named a member of the Basketball Hall of Fame…

0 Comments
March 22, 2013
Blog / Freedom / Leadership

The limits of what you can achieve

The changes you can make that will affect your life most are in your personal leadership skills -- how you perceive yourself, others, and your environment; how you manage conflict; how you influence yourself and others; and the other components of leadership. These changes will affect how you experience life more than external things like winning the lottery, where you live, etc, no matter how big they seem. In fact, if you don't change these things, you can win the lottery or any other big change and the important parts of your life won't change much. You might have a fancier car or bigger house, but they won't mean much more to you. You won't have more, fewer, or closer friends. You won't be more…

0 Comments
March 19, 2013
Blog / Leadership

Do you think leadership is an all-the-time thing? Are you now a great leader?

If, applying Vince Lombardi's quote yesterday to leadership, you believe leadership is an all-the-time thing, and you want to be a great leader, or even just an effective one, are you a great leader now? Are you living a great life now? If you think you will be a great leader ever and you believe it's an all-the-time thing, don't you then think you are a great leader now, as surely as any other great leader was at every point in their careers? If you believe you will become as great a leader as any historical leader and you don't already consider yourself great, why not declare now once-and-for-all, to yourself at least, that you are a great leader and live accordingly? If you don't…

0 Comments
March 13, 2013
Blog / Leadership

Pick a great historical leader. The leader you know didn’t do what you think they did. And what that means for you now.

The Martin Luther King, Jr you know won the Nobel Prize, was murdered in 1968, has a national holiday in his name, and has hundreds of streets and schools named after him. The man who helped organize and lead the Montgomery Bus Boycott, went to jail for his beliefs, and gave the "I Have a Dream" speech had not done any of those things. The man who helped organize and lead the Montgomery Bus Boycott was a regular guy like you and me. He was a regular 26-year-old guy four years out of college, two years into a marriage, almost finished his doctorate. He didn't know where the boycott would lead.  The March on Washington was eight years away. The Civil Rights Act was nine…

0 Comments
March 12, 2013
Blog / Leadership

Your life wouldn’t be better if your world was worse

Does it ever occur to you that part of what made Gandhi or Martin Luther King, Jr. so great were the adversity that they had to face and overcome? That if you lived in a world with such injustice, you'd have cause to overcome it too and you might reach that level of greatness? I wonder how many people think, "I'd be a better leader if only I lived at a time like MLK did or Gandhi did so I'd have a noble cause to work on." No way! This is specious thinking. I think people tend to think it internally as a way to excuse not achieving their potential, but I don't think people voice it often. If they voiced it anyone who heard…

0 Comments
March 10, 2013
Video: Mansudae Hill, location of 20-meter tall statues of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il
Leadership / NorthKorea

Video: Mansudae Hill, location of 20-meter tall statues of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il

Here we are approaching Mansudae Hill, the location of 20-meter tall statues of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il.  Love the men or hate them, they ruled the country for seventy years, so they're important for the people here. We see children leaving the giant statues of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il. At the start I was holding the camera at my side to be more respectful but picked it up when I saw everyone else holding their cameras up. Toward the end I show the 20-meter tall statues and their grand surroundings. Kim Jong Il's statue was just unveiled by his father's. The last clip in the video shows North Korean people and families departing after paying respects to Kims' statues.…

0 Comments
March 1, 2013
Video: Revolutionary Martyrs’ Cemetery on the hundredth anniversary of Kim Il Sung’s birth
Freedom / Leadership / NorthKorea

Video: Revolutionary Martyrs’ Cemetery on the hundredth anniversary of Kim Il Sung’s birth

A video of the Revolutionary Martyrs' Cemetery on the hundredth anniversary of Kim Il Sung's birth -- roughly like being at Arlington on July 4, 1976. There were many soldiers and foreign tourists, making for an odd mix. Normally the government prohibits tourists from taking pictures of the military, but perhaps for the special day, since they were there ceremonially, and since there were so many of them they let us take pictures and video of them. The cemetery also overlooks Pyongyang and the Mausoleum holding the bodies of Kim Il Sung and, presumably by this point, Kim Jong Il, though they hadn't yet reopened the mausoleum after Kim Jong Il's death by this point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=voIgE4XraSs More footage of the cemetery More footage of the…

0 Comments
February 27, 2013
Blog / Leadership

George Clooney on being yourself in the face of adversity

For my third post on George Clooney's Inside the Actors Studio interview, here he speaks on being yourself in challenging situations. I've written on the overlap I see between the art and craft of leadership and acting, how both deeply involve being aware of knowing and managing your emotions so you can know and evoke emotions in others. I think the training of leaders can benefit from the more mature field of training actors, and I'll write more on that later. What Clooney says about actors I believe applies to leaders as well, since leaders necessarily work where others can judge them. Leaders can't hide. Leaders have to be present and themselves, so criticism and judgment of their work and their team's work always has…

0 Comments
February 27, 2013
Video: Bringing peace sooner: High-fiving North Koreans in Kim Il Sung Square, part 2
Blog / Freedom / Leadership / NorthKorea

Video: Bringing peace sooner: High-fiving North Koreans in Kim Il Sung Square, part 2

Shortly after last post's videos, we returned to Kim Il Sung Square and interacted with more North Koreans, overcoming language obstacles in North Korea with friendly body language. If our would-be leaders don't create peace, understanding, and communication between us, we have to lead them. The more we interact the more we understand each other. That's how we show we aren't the monsters or dupes their government says we are and vice versa. When was the last time you saw so many North Koreans smiling, shaking hands, high-fiving, and laughing with Americans? The woman you see returning my camera after the middle segment was our North Korean guide, who held the camera for me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxWImTKf57I Images of our arrival at Kim Il Sung Square (repeated…

0 Comments
February 26, 2013

End of content

No more pages to load

Newer Posts
Older Posts