The past few posts talked about using self-talk to lead yourself. Today I’ll mention a few things about leading others by influencing their self-talk. To me, influencing someone’s self-talk feels easier than changing their beliefs, but the effect is roughly the same. Trying to change other people’s beliefs sounds hard, especially if you can’t change your own beliefs. It’s easier when you realize some simple things about how others have[…] Keep reading →

Knowing your self-talk lets you change how you perceive and influence your world more than almost anything. That knowledge helps you understand and influence how your team members, peers, bosses, and so on perceive their worlds. It’s a powerful lever. Your beliefs affect how you perceive your world. Everything you observe gets filtered through your beliefs. If you think Bob is a jerk, you will filter everything you see about[…] Keep reading →

Yesterday I posted a short passage of self-talk you might have come up with yourself doing the self-talk exercises I recommend as two of the best exercises I know to raise your self-awareness (exercise 1: write your self-talk; exercise 2: voice your self-talk). Let’s do another, this time in the context of walking into a crowded room in a social situation. First, have you noticed what people do when they[…] Keep reading →

I’ve written before about the value of raising awareness of your self-talk and two exercises to raise it. The first is to write out your self-talk. The second, and harder, is to voice it. I still consider the first — writing your self-talk a few times a day every day for a week — one of the best, if not the best, self-awareness raising exercises I know of. I start[…] Keep reading →

(Working on a presentation, I had to rewrite a post from a couple months ago. It’s very similar to the original, but I thought there’d be value in posting a slightly different way of putting it. I hope that value is more important than the repetition). If you read this blog you know about the researchers who asked people who won huge lotteries and people who just had accidents leading[…] Keep reading →

I think it helps to look at the world from a different point of view sometimes. You see things differently. When I did yoga, sometimes my teacher would have us cross our arms left over right instead of right over left (or vice versa, depending on how you did it normally). If you’ve never done it, try it. I doubt it will make you suddenly enlightened, but it feels weird[…] Keep reading →

[This post is part of a series on Coaching Highlights from coaching Columbia Business School students. If you don’t see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you’ll get more value than reading just this post.] Just the structure of yesterday’s charts teaches a lot about leadership. They emerged as main tools for communicating leadership ability and guiding improvement so even if you’re[…] Keep reading →