Lillian Chan is an independent film producer and friend who has attended and recorded a couple of my seminars and now my gallery opening. She wrote a few paragraphs reviewing the seminars.

Two observations I’ve made about how good people are at things: People who aren’t good at something talk about how awesome they are at it. People who are great at something talk about the humiliations and failures that got them good at it. I’ve found this pattern far more accurate than I would have expected. I love hearing stories from people about the disasters that made them who they are.[…] Keep reading →

People confuse someone else’s values being different from their own with being worse than their own. If other people’s values were worse, then statements like the following two would portend the end of society. The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no[…] Keep reading →

This post on doing things you love even if you’re not good at it prompted discussion — or at least people asking me about doing things that feel scary or are hard. For most people, the challenges are internal. Most people aren’t risking health and safety doing something like climbing Everest — they’re thinking of trying out for that senior position, singing karaoke, going to a gym for the first[…] Keep reading →

Can you think of anyone who isn’t trying to make the world a better place in his or her own way? The statement means nothing if everyone says it. And effectively everyone does. Think of the worst people you can. Weren’t they trying to make the world a better place, in their minds at least? You can say how wrong these terrible people were, but in their minds they weren’t[…] Keep reading →

Following up my previous post in this thread, I forgot a few judgmental words and some tips on avoiding sounding judgmental. The judgmental words see frequent usage: Should Ought to Impressed A friend once said “there are very few shoulds in life.” I found his observation helpful. I have found avoiding telling people what they should or shouldn’t do helpful. When you say someone should do something they aren’t doing,[…] Keep reading →

The past two days covered the how we can be judgmental without meaning it — first with clearly judgmental language, then with implicitly judgmental words. Today let’s look at exercises to change. My normal first step for change is to start by building awareness. In this case, changing builds awareness so much and the exercises are so easy (they don’t involve anyone else), I recommend just starting with the change.[…] Keep reading →