Clients and nearly everyone I talk to about it consider changing beliefs one of the hardest things to do. Changing beliefs voluntarily is fundamental to the Method, so I help people develop the ability a lot. Experience has made me pretty good at it, at least compared to my ability in the past. Based on how much I used to argue, I don’t think I started with any particular advantage[…] Keep reading →

I’ve written before on the persuasive but specious rhetorical trick that goes something like John is very conservative about these things. Mary is very liberal. Me, I’m practical and… Do you sense that you’re probably going to agree with what the speaker next says? Extremists like John and Mary are difficult to deal with. People reject extreme views out of hand. You don’t want to be like that, do you?[…] Keep reading →

Do you ever wish you made more money or had more power, fame, free time, or something else others have and you don’t? Maybe you look at Brad Pitt or Oprah Winfrey and think, I wish I had what they do. Then you get stuck realizing you don’t and feeling sorry. I’ve found the problem isn’t their having something and you not having it. The problem is you wishing you[…] Keep reading →

A client asked about something in his personal life. He does things one way that most parts of society do differently. To be clear, his way harmed no one and was in no way illegal, but he was concerned that people who learned about it might freak out. Sorry I have to keep the details to a minimum, but we all recognize his situation is universal. We all have things[…] Keep reading →

A couple clients recently thanked me for some advice I had given outside our main conversation, almost as asides, but that worked. Every word counts I told them that every word you say contributes to your identity, even if only to yourself. And that every word influences how everyone, including yourself, perceives you. Context They were talking about some problems they were working through. They said things like “I have[…] Keep reading →

After my recent posts on the environment, the Do The Math blog, and the Sustainable Energy book I liked, a friend and Columbia engineer, Marshall Cox, is succeeding in a business plan competition to help reduce waste with a company called Radiator Labs. They have a simple idea that could cheaply reduce a lot of waste and make people’s buildings more comfortable. A why-didn’t-someone-think-of-that-a-long-time-ago idea you can’t imagine someone not[…] Keep reading →

A recent conversation with a friend who also coaches highlighted some important observations of mastering your emotions and improving your life. We were talking about my Model and Method and how you can predictably and consistently create the emotions and motivations you want. He described how he started putting this stuff into practice. He had learned techniques to change emotions — basically to choose new environments, beliefs, and behaviors. He[…] Keep reading →