Monthly Archives: January 2013

Motivating with compassion but without empathy: telling someone to let go doesn’t help them let go

on January 31, 2013 in Blog, Leadership

Do you ever find yourself trying to get someone to let go of something, to relax, or something similar, but they don’t? You know if they just didn’t worry so much or stopped caring about something so much, they’d have an easier time with the project, relationship, life, or whatever, but they just don’t let go? You may be motivated by compassion, but I suspect a lack of empathy may[…] Keep reading →

Common objection 12: I’ve worked so long and hard but feel like I’m getting nowhere or going backward

on January 30, 2013 in Blog, Leadership, Tips

[This post is part of a series on internal objections and blocks and how to overcome them. If you don’t see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you’ll get more value than reading just this post.] Objection I don’t think you can significantly change your life, at least not at the beginning, without thinking something like I’ve been working on this for[…] Keep reading →

Sports in the rain and values changing

on January 29, 2013 in Blog, Fitness

The other day it rained and I skipped playing ultimate frisbee in Shanghai. It reminded me of playing in college and after. In the Northeast of the U.S., especially in late fall, leading to Regionals, it rained and snowed a lot. Weather didn’t change that you simply went to practice. We practiced and played in snow, wind, rain, etc. I played disc the year I lived in Paris, taking a[…] Keep reading →

An Example of Great Parenting

on January 28, 2013 in Blog

Years ago I heard of a great examples of parenting I’ve heard of from one of the great people I’ve met in my life. Not having kids — merely the favorite uncle — I don’t know parenting firsthand, but I understand it’s challenging and related to leadership. My friend lives halfway around the world from me so I haven’t kept in touch with her. I can’t mention much about her[…] Keep reading →

How to decide among close options

on January 27, 2013 in Blog, Tips

I’ve written before about why deciding is hard. One of my most helpful (to me) insights was that the difficulty in deciding is not figuring out which option I like, but working up the nerve to get rid of the options I don’t choose. Our language illustrates this challenge — the -cide in decide is the same -cide as in pesticide, insecticide, etc. It means to kill, reiterating that the[…] Keep reading →

Exercise helps everything

on January 26, 2013 in Blog, Fitness, Tips

Exercise helps everything. I can’t think of any time or situation exercise doesn’t help. Whenever I’m not sure what to do, I think, “exercise can’t hurt.” Even if all I do is a burpee or two, I find it clarifies my thoughts. I’ve never found a case where exercise worsened a situation. Even if I’m in an insane hurry, where I feel every second counts, a push-up or two barely[…] Keep reading →

Monkey Mind

on January 25, 2013 in Awareness, Blog, Freedom, Tips

Illustrative labels can help, as opposed to evaluative, judgmental ones like yesterday’s post. I love the term “Monkey Mind.” I heard it from a friend who teaches yoga. Without hearing any explanation I immediately understood its meaning and saw how the term helped understand a concept. When you increase your self-awareness you start to notice how your mind works. The less you know how to manage it, the more it[…] Keep reading →