I’ve noticed many of my values differ from what I see in mainstream American culture. See how yours differ too. What I call mainstream may differ from what you call mainstream and at times I deliberately overstate the mainstream American view to parody it. Category “Mainstream” American view (oversimplified) Josh’s view (oversimplified) Jobs Horrible way to waste your time. A necessary evil we have to endure. A source of challenges[…] Keep reading →

[This post is part of a series on Communication Skills Exercises for Business and Life. If you don’t see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the series, where you’ll get more value than reading just this post.] Here are examples of two masters of voicing their self-talk, Robin Williams and (I believe) his mentor Jonathan Winters. They make great role models for what level of[…] Keep reading →

People, left to themselves, don’t seem to care about people on the other side of the planet. They seem to want to pursue happiness and enjoy themselves if they can. My observations in North Korea reinforced this sentiment. It raises the question why North Korea and the United States harbor so much animosity. History answers the question at a low level. My visit revealed to me deeper reasons. In all[…] Keep reading →

This exercise transforms your life. It has you do the first three steps of the Method, prepares you for the fourth, and sets up accountability with others for step 4. Accountability is how things get done, so it can help a lot. I do this exercise halfway through my seminar. People get deeply into it, even after sitting in a room for five or six hours. When we review the[…] Keep reading →

The Method’s steps 2 and 3 have you conceive of new emotions, environments, beliefs, and behaviors for emotional cycles you want to change. The challenge How do you pick the new beliefs to crowd out the old ones? Choosing the opposite to existing beliefs rarely helps. You end up debating yourself in your head. Discussion I find complements to beliefs crowd out existing ones more effectively. For example, I found[…] Keep reading →

Many people feel they can’t change themselves or that doing so is fake. Here is a quick exercise to show you how easily you can change yourself because you do it already. Step 1 First answer the question “Who are you?” by describing yourself with three or four adjectives. I know you’re just reading a web page, but if you have pen and paper or can open a window on[…] Keep reading →

If you lined up all the cycles in your life by the amount of reward they brought you, you might represent them like this. The low bar on the left might represent something you can never get right — like feeling helpless about your weight if you’re overweight or about a big debt you have to repay. The high bar on the right might represent the joy you feel for[…] Keep reading →

[This post is part of a series on The Method to use The Model — my model for the human emotional system designed for use in leadership, self-awareness, and general purpose professional and personal development — which I find the most effective and valuable foundation for understanding yourself and others and improving your life. If you don’t see a Table of Contents to the left, click here to view the[…] Keep reading →

I just read a post, “Google is FUBAR,” (for non-geeks, fubar means “f‘ed up beyond all recognition) suggesting the company is on a slippery slope leading not to its demise but to move its practices from what people like to what will lock them in and to risk more forays into anti-trust and privacy territories. Why is Google FUBAR, then? … It must irreparably alter its fleet of successful web[…] Keep reading →