I responded to some questions from someone practicing “The most effective self-awareness exercise I know” and thought the answers would help others doing the exercise. Or might help motivate people to try it if they haven’t. I think it makes sense without the question. I’ll check with the person practicing about including the question. Here’s what I wrote: The feeling that you don’t have anything to write or that your[…] Keep reading →

I believe that whatever someone does, ultimately I am responsible for my emotions. Someone can try to make me feel unhappy, but they can’t unless I let them. I didn’t always feel that way. I used to blame others for how I felt. Maybe someone more skilled at making me feel bad could outdo my skills at resilience, but it hasn’t happened yet, at least not since I started developing[…] Keep reading →

It’s the new year. Many of us partied last night. A few nights ago I came back from a friend’s place. A few longtime friends got together to visit. The me of years ago would have found the event boring since we mostly just talked, ate, and drank wine. But, like most of the people in my life, everybody cared about their project, hobbies, etc and we talked about what[…] Keep reading →

[EDIT: I covered this series in more depth in Leadership Step by Step, so I recommend the book, but the core is here. I use The Model as a part of my life, basically daily.] Here is The Model—my model for the human emotional system designed for use in leadership, self-awareness, and general purpose professional and personal development—in series form. Click in the table of contents to the left for each[…] Keep reading →

I think dessert is standard after dinner in the U.S., especially at restaurants. Even if you don’t eat one, they give you the dessert menu to think about it. I read that only a generation ago dessert tended to be just a piece of fruit, and not every day. Less dessert seems like less sweets, but more overall appreciation of sweetness. That is, I think eating less or fewer sweets[…] Keep reading →

I feel like many people consider malaise or frustration the dominant mood of today’s world. Maybe that’s just the media because outrage gets page views and sells ads, not fulfillment or contentment. Of the people I spend time with, nearly everyone loves what they do. As far as I can tell, they feel generally good. Not always, of course, but overall. A lot of people complain a lot. Maybe they[…] Keep reading →

Talk about leadership and someone will ask if leaders are born or made. If you’re just idly chatting, it’s a fine pointless question to pass the time with. If you want to develop as a leader, I suggest the question will waste your time. No great leader started leading in a vacuum, nor as a child. They all developed somehow. Even if they had a greater potential than you do,[…] Keep reading →