Category Archives: Relationships

The joy of understanding people we disagree with

on June 19, 2025 in Relationships, Tips

The paragraph and three questions below appeared in a recent post about learning from people whose ideas and views I don’t know enough to agree or disagree with. After writing them, I thought they deserved their own post. Part of why I’m posting and practicing these things is how clear disagreements become when one seeks to understand everyone independently of taking a side. Have you heard of the trend to[…] Keep reading →

How we act when at the top of a dominance hierarchy: Learning from Thomas Jefferson

on June 16, 2025 in Freedom, Leadership, Relationships

I’ve written many times about Thomas Jefferson embodying American culture today. He said all the right things about freedom and liberty. He considered slavery wrong. He still practiced it. His rationalizations and justifications are ours. I link to a bunch of those posts at the bottom of this post. I recommend them. If you want to understand how you sound to someone who lives by values you likely say you[…] Keep reading →

My comment on the media pooh-poohing “bros”

on April 30, 2025 in Nonjudgment, Relationships

I wrote this letter to the editor of the New Yorker. It’s been long enough that I doubt they’ll print it, but I wanted to share my thoughts. Everyone knows our culture misunderstands women. I think men could use more compassion and that doing so won’t hurt any other group. To the editor, Andrew Marantz’s article The Battle for the Bros perpetuates a subtle but common double standard: when society[…] Keep reading →

More cultural exchange because of not flying: plinking and target practice

on April 22, 2025 in Freedom, HandsOnPracticalExperience, Nonjudgment, Relationships

I don’t know your views on guns, but I value both exploring different cultures and not polluting, which destroys life, liberty, and property. When my friend invites me to go to target practice at his shooting range outside the city, I’m happy to explore a culture as different from Greenwich Village, NYU, and Columbia as most places on earth. Unlike nearly anyone I know, I find cultures as diverse as[…] Keep reading →

Democrats and Republicans are dancing together on sustainability for their mutual benefit, avoiding action, rallying their bases

on April 9, 2025 in Leadership, Models, Nature, Relationships

A brief political history of sustainability [If you’ve watched my Short Course on Sustainability Leadership, you’ll recognize the following from my session on the political opportunities. I’m putting only the main points here. I’ll develop it more in a future post. I wanted to start writing. If you haven’t watched the course, I think you’ll find it one of the most important resources on our culture, the environment, sustainability, and[…] Keep reading →

People thinking sustainability is easier if single are insensitive, lacking empathy and compassion

on March 27, 2025 in HandsOnPracticalExperience, Relationships

I’ve been holding back on posting this post’s idea for months, maybe years. It’s a simple concept, though bold. More importantly, some may find it offensive, but, if so, no more offensive than people are with me. Over and over people tell me it’s easier to practice sustainability for someone who is single. They suggest I can decide things unilaterally. Lacking hands-on practical experience, they think the hard part of[…] Keep reading →

Corollaries to my recent post: Replacing “sustainability” with “not hurting people” and “polluting” with “hurting people”

on March 1, 2025 in Models, Relationships

I want to clarify some consequences of realizing that polluting means hurting people, as I wrote in my post Replacing “sustainability” with “not hurting people” and “polluting” with “hurting people”. People often say that some people can’t worry about sustainability because they’re working three jobs to take care of three kids and having to worry about the next meal means they don’t have the luxury of worrying about the environment.[…] Keep reading →

Why do people like hearing me share my vulnerabilities?

on February 7, 2025 in Awareness, Nonjudgment, Relationships

People like hearing me share my vulnerabilities. I’m not special. People like hearing anyone share their vulnerabilities too, but I noticed it this week about myself. At the beginning of this week, I thought about blind spots. We all have things we do or don’t do, or know or don’t know, and we aren’t aware of the consequences differing from what we expect. Learning about them can help us improve[…] Keep reading →

What people mean when they say “We have to have a conversation about…” (hint: it’s not about having a conversation)

on January 31, 2025 in Awareness, Relationships

I hear people say “we have to have a conversation about…” some controversial topic like racism, abortion, and the usual topics. Yet the controversy shows we’re talking about them. So what do they mean if the conversation is already happening? What they don’t mean While I can’t read anyone’s mind, I know they aren’t saying they want to learn new views. They can learn by reading and watching. If they[…] Keep reading →

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