The concept of competition implies beating the other person. In sports the concept is a standard, fundamental part. In everyday use outside of sports that beating the other person often carries a tinge of accusation or wrongdoing. People accuse others of being over-competitive, which they look down on. I’ve never heard anyone accuse another of being under-competitive. In business, competition often carries a noble ring. Business culture holds that business[…] Keep reading →

I first met Sebastian Marshall about five years ago in New York City through mutual friends. Though he was just over half my age at the time, I don’t hesitate to say I’ve learned as much from him as nearly anyone — and I’ve studied with Nobel Prize winners. He’s been a great friend since. We’ve since met in Kuala Lumpur, Beijing, and often on the internet. I continue learning[…] Keep reading →

When someone gets animated others often describe them as emotional: “John is acting so emotional” “Jane got so emotional when Ryan said …” and things like that. I’d like to suggest an alternative perspective I think you’ll find more precise and useful: Everybody feels emotions all the time. What’s the difference? When someone sits quietly reading, they aren’t acting or feeling unemotional. I suggest the are feeling and acting on[…] Keep reading →

Life has only one finishing line, which is when you die (I hope I didn’t break that news to you). Everything else is a part of life — no more an end to one thing before than a beginning to something else. That view seems inarguable. Whatever happens to you, no matter how much you like it or not, if you haven’t died you’ll continue past it. So how can[…] Keep reading →

I didn’t mean to write yesterday’s post on starting with emotion on exercise, food, and habits. I meant to contrast how I like to exercise with how people who don’t exercise seem to and then to tell today’s story. People who don’t exercise seem to characterize it as torture and dislike it. I see it as fun and rewarding. Sometimes it feels like torture, but only when I know the feeling[…] Keep reading →

I find Americans try to get precise and scientific about food and exercise, in contrast to how incredibly unfit the country is. I write “try to” because I don’t think they succeed in being precise or scientific. The term carbohydrate, for example, used to have a specific scientific meaning. I think it still does, but I think in standard American usage it means “bad” or “evil,” like the term fat[…] Keep reading →

Brought to you by the Distinguished Leaders committee of the Columbia Business School Alumni Club of New York (copying the following announcement from that site): Leadership Through Self-Awareness and Emotional Intelligence In a weekend, learn how to develop your personal leadership skills, self-awareness, and emotional intelligence through the latest advances in cognitive behavioral science, evolutionary psychology, and positive psychology. While business schools and corporations are increasingly focusing on personal leadership,[…] Keep reading →

How can you expect to lead others if you can’t lead yourself? This post, like most of mine, is about leadership. If you can’t lead yourself, how can you expect to lead others? If you don’t understand your emotions and motivations and how to create the ones you want in yourself, how do you expect to do so with others? Alternatively, the better you can lead yourself, the better you[…] Keep reading →

When the topic of meditation came up the other day I heard the same thing I’ve heard many times before. I’m sure you’ve heard and said similar thing for similar activities: “Oh, I can’t meditate. My mind is too frantic. I wish I could.” Maybe you’ve heard or said it in this form: “Oh, I can’t go to the gym. I’m too out-of-shape. I wish I could.” or: “Oh, I[…] Keep reading →