A client who knows I’ve applied a lot from evolutionary psychology to leadership and self-awareness wrote: What’s your opinion of the theory that language serves primarily as persuasion? In its raw form, I’m currently telling you that you are an authority by asking a question. And that sentence might seem like it’s an authoritative statement, but instead it is clarifying my question, which in its clarification is a neediness to[…] Keep reading →

“Just do what I say.” “Do it now.” “John, do X. Sally, do Y. I’ll do Z. Then we’ll met and put everything together.” Wouldn’t leadership be easy if we could tell everyone what to do and they’d do it? It never seems to work like that, though, does it? Most people understand that problems come up. They don’t always realize that command-and-control leadership often discourages people from working with[…] Keep reading →

“You don’t understand me!” “I wish I’d never been born!” Who hasn’t yelled something like that at their parents? I’m sure I did. I argued with my parents like all kids. I’ve grown since then and don’t argue like that any more. I still disagree, I just try more to seek understanding, not to confront so adversarially. I was just in a line and overheard two workers argue. They weren’t[…] Keep reading →

My professor cursed: “You’re too fucking cheap to buy my book?!” This was an Ivy League business school. I was stunned. Class just ended and I was asking him a question, as students do. Other students probably heard as they packed their bags and left the room. He had assigned his own book for the class. A couple weeks before, the bookstore clerk told me the book would come out[…] Keep reading →

Following up yesterday’s post on how one simple change in perspective can dramatically change how you view things, which then changes how you react to them, here are a few other examples. Note that I’m not writing about right or wrong, just different beliefs and following how small changes in beliefs can lead to big changes in behavior and mood. My goal is to promote flexibility in beliefs. Running shoes[…] Keep reading →

I wrote before about “One of the best books I’ve read on the environment, our impact on it, and what we can do about it” as well as two videos based on it. The book is called Sustainable Energy — Without the Hot Air. There several books in the “Without Hot Air” series. If the others are half as informative and useful as the environment one, I’ll love them. An[…] Keep reading →

Today’s world presents leaders leading a group of people like a king or glorious leader, like Mel Gibson in Braveheart. It inspires people to seek that glorious position where they feel people look up to them. We misunderstand that view, the more I think about it. When armies went into battle then, the first person charging took the biggest risk. He made himself most vulnerable to attack, risking his life.[…] Keep reading →

“I’m stuck because I can’t find a job in pharmacology.” “I don’t like law but what else can I do?” “I wish I could get out of engineering.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people talk this way. People about to graduate looking for jobs and people in the workforce alike. Even people from elite universities. They believe you have to make a living in what they[…] Keep reading →

Every system of leadership, professional development, and personal development I’ve heard of has some concept of raising your self-awareness. “Know thyself.” “The unexamined life is not worth living.” Acting on the advice isn’t easy for many. Today I’ll post some tips. Generally knowing yourself means knowing your motivations, values, what you find meaningful, and so on. I find all these things are rooted in your emotions. The more you understand[…] Keep reading →