“He’s so lucky! He never puts on weight!” “She’s so lucky! She loses weight so fast!” I hear people say things like that all the time. If I eat one unhealthy meal, I can see it on my belly. But then even after running a marathon I don’t see that fat go away. Fat goes on immediately and takes a long time and a lot of work to get off.[…] Keep reading →

The college course catalog fascinated me—hundreds of courses in dozens of subjects from amazing teachers. I wanted to take them all! Choosing four or five course from them was wonderful torture. Choosing which to take wasn’t nearly as hard as choosing which not to. I used to think, “I’ll take these two courses … which will set me up for this major … which will set me up for this[…] Keep reading →

If you believe you’ll never make CEO, start a company, lose weight, or any other goal, no matter how much you change your behavior to achieve it, your belief will undermine that behavior. If you’re lucky, you may stumble into an experience that changes your beliefs, which may sustain your behavior, but I wouldn’t count on it. In general, if you change behavior but not the belief that motivated the[…] Keep reading →

In March I performed a story at Stand Up For Passion, a growing series of events where people tell stories about passionate events in their lives. They posted the video of my story and here it is. I hope you like it. The events are happening increasingly all over the world. The next one in New York City is October 6. I recommend attending one. Here are the speakers from[…] Keep reading →

There are a lot of things worth paying attention to and spending time on trying to affect. If you can’t or won’t do anything about something you don’t like, it doesn’t improve your life to worry about it or to take time away from something you like or can do something about. You can call it “choosing your battles” or “discretion is the better part of valor.” If you’re taking[…] Keep reading →

People considering personal change often express concern about losing friends. If they change their behavior and habits they won’t be able to hang out with the same people in the same way any more. I’ve gone through a lot of personal change. I’ve met many people who have. I’ve coached many people through it. Through it all, I’ve never met someone who regretted changing their social circle. Most wished they’d[…] Keep reading →

“I’m stuck because I can’t find a job in pharmacology.” “I don’t like law but what else can I do?” “I wish I could get out of engineering.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people talk this way. People about to graduate looking for jobs and people in the workforce alike. Even people from elite universities. They believe you have to make a living in what they[…] Keep reading →

This morning I read New York magazine’s weekly listing of bars and restaurants, describing fun places in the city to go to. They have a section listing some activities called “The Cut,” which I think means these are the activities that “make the cut” of their curating. I used to read the listings to find things to do. The section is for that, and I presume many people use it[…] Keep reading →

Following up on “Passions, you create,” which I recommend rereading, where I wrote about passion not being something you happen to find, like if you just turned over enough rocks you’d find it… Everyone has the same potential to develop passions, as far as I can tell. If all you do is turn over rocks but never dig in—that is, look at what others do and think about those things[…] Keep reading →