[EDIT February 2020: I gathered, edited, and compiled all the posts I listed below into my book ReModel, which I recommend if you prefer a more curated experience with less clicking. Either way, I recommend doing the exercise. It gives a new way of seeing the world that costs nothing and takes little time.] This series covers my doing my Write Your Beliefs exercise, which I’ve found one of the[…] Keep reading →

I wrote the following to someone and couldn’t help sharing it here. There’s a common belief that passions are something you find. Like if you just turn over enough rocks you’ll find yours. It’s a nice fantasy and excuse for people who haven’t achieved much to explain why they haven’t and others have: “Well, I could do as much as so-and-so if I had found my passion. When I do[…] Keep reading →

Different people suggest starting habits different ways. Some say to start with behavior, like setting a New Year’s resolution or doing it every day for a month. Others suggest starting by changing your environment, like by putting a note on your computer monitor or daily schedule, wearing a device that measures your exercise, or joining a web page that tracks and reminds you. That’s all low-level tactics. Tactics, no matter[…] Keep reading →

Notice this pattern and you’ll know how to improve it. It applies to an activity. I’m thinking of exercise when I write it, but many activities fit it. The pattern When you’re not about to do it, you think of it as something you generally want to do. When you’re about to do it, you feel anxious, maybe to the point of fear. You have to overcome that anxiety and[…] Keep reading →

Continuing my series of alternative responses to the New York Times column, The Ethicist, looking at the consequences of one’s actions instead of imposing values on others, here is a take on today’s post,”A Boy Named Dana.” I have applied over email for internships with several high-tech companies in the Bay Area, and I suspect I have benefited from my potential employers’ incorrectly assuming that I am a woman. Many[…] Keep reading →

Continuing my series of alternative responses to the New York Times column, The Ethicist, looking at the consequences of one’s actions instead of imposing values on others, here is a take on today’s post,”The Perks of Being a Layabout.” My 28-year-old son has decided to become a novelist. He recently took a part-time job at a grocery store, working just 15 hours a week to pay his bills, leaving him[…] Keep reading →

EDIT: since writing this post I came up with the term doof, which I describe in this podcast episode: I recommend never calling doof food or food doof. Here’s the original post: Did you know antifreeze tastes sweet? It will also kill you if you drink it. Laws require putting something in it to taste bitter because its sweetness leads kids, dogs, cats, and other pets to drink it. Like[…] Keep reading →

“Need” is a powerful word. People use it wrong a lot. If you do, you’re probably hurting your credibility and ability to influence. It implies sloppy communication and probably sloppy thinking. People often say things like: “You need to calm down,” when they want you calm, “You need to be quiet,” when they want you quiet, “You need to listen more,” when they want you to understand them, and so[…] Keep reading →

Continuing my series of alternative responses to the New York Times column, The Ethicist, looking at the consequences of one’s actions instead of imposing values on others, here is a take on today’s post, ”A Survey Course in Campus Ethics.” I teach part time at a well-respected regional college. For the past few years, the college has accepted several students from China who do not, in my opinion, have the[…] Keep reading →