Awareness


When you know someone will (mis)interpret everything you say their way, do you talk to them?

The title says half of it: When you know someone will interpret everything you say their way, do you talk to them? The other half: What if they're your parents? No, I didn't just have a fight with a parent, but I do talk to a lot of people who interpret what I say as best I can tell based on preconceptions of what they expect someone talking about what I talk about to say. For example, if I suggest how for nearly all of human existence our ancestors lived with more equality and freedom than we do, they respond "You want to return to the Stone Age?" If you want, I can list more examples. The pattern reminds me of my parents growing up,…

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A rare 360 degree rainbow in the middle of a sunny day yesterday

The title and the pictures speak for themselves, though can't capture the beauty of seeing it in person. Also, when you see a rainbow, pointing it out to people creates fun and connection. I was in Washington Square Park and I saw not one person see this rainbow except people I showed it too and the people who saw the joy and amazement in the people I showed it to. I saw a 360 degree rainbow from my rooftop a little over a year ago, also on a sunny day. I saw a beautiful rainbow near my home over a decade ago. How much natural beauty are we missing, too busy looking at our screens? I hope I didn't blow out my camera pointing straight…

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Misunderstanding Hate and Humanity

I wrote last year about how We can’t turn off our emotional systems and we all share the same emotions, regarding NYU's likely well-intentioned but misguided posters decrying saying "hate has no place at NYU." I wrote then: To say “Hate has no place at NYU” seems like saying “Thumbs have no place at NYU” or “Spleens have no place at NYU.” We all have the wiring to hate. To say it has no place at NYU means no human has a place at NYU. To clarify: I understand they don’t mean it literally. I’m not trying to single out NYU. I hear these phrases everywhere. Overall, I’m confident I agree with their intended message, though I can’t be sure, since whatever they mean to…

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Today’s greatest privilege: denying one’s personal contribution to pollution, depletion, plunder, and imperialism

Liberals talk a lot about privilege. Conservatives, libertarians, and other political groups have their problems facing their contribution to our environmental problems, but liberals contribute as much. Their denial is through the roof. In particular, they throw around the term 'privilege' like it was candy. I think they think they're silencing the people they accuse of it, but in a way the other person deserves, doesn't realize, and benefits from owning up to. My point is not to accuse back but to invite people to try taking personal responsibility for the effects of their actions on others, especially innocent people. I predict people will find the initial discomfort of facing one's internal conflicts worth the uncomfortable emotions it causes to connect to them. I've learned…

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Simple Pleasures

I keep thinking of little things that bring me joy and want to collect them in a post. I never start the post because I can only think of a few every time I post. I'm going to start the post with only a few and add to it. Finding a spot on my apartment floor, counter, etc I haven't cleaned, then cleaning it for the first time. It tends to be corners Chopping with a freshly sharpened knife Eating fruit just picked from a tree Sorry if you're reading this when I just posted and have only three items, but I hope you enjoy cleaning your floors as much as I do. If you think of simple pleasures that belong on the list, let…

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People living contrary to their values say bizarre things

I was talking to someone who pollutes more than most people while being aware of environmental problems. She bought a luxury SUV and flies around for fun. She compares herself to people who pollute and deplete more and says, "I'm not as bad as them" and concludes that she's one of the good ones---which doesn't follow, logically. In the course of conversation, she said about her unsustainable practices, ". . . I don't do things the way you want me to." What a bizarre way to put it. I don't want people to steal or murder, but I hope the reason people don't steal or murder is to avoid hurting other people, especially innocent ones. It would be weird to avoid stealing and murdering to…

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I’ve learned to enjoy just thinking
Greenwich Village Sun

I’ve learned to enjoy just thinking

I've held back on posting this discovery since I think people might confuse it with boredom or having nothing better to do and I didn't want to be judged, but as I've cut out more media, I've found it enjoyable, relaxing, and rewarding just to think . . . to ponder, consider, reflect, introspect, daydream, and such. I mean something different than meditating. I meditate too, as one of my sidchas, but meditation is about consciousness, awareness, patience, and such. This activity is more like solving problems that take some thought to disentangle. Figuring things out. Some of my best writing comes from it. I don't schedule it, but I don't shy away from it. I'd been doing it for a while, but I think…

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Just finished a 4-plus days water only fast

Today about 1:30pm I ate my first food since Saturday noon: a bit over four days or 97.5 hours. Years ago I would have thought it impossible, but I've done a couple three-day fasts and a few two-day fasts, now several one-day fasts. With my six-day exercise cycle that I start on the first day of each month, for months with a number of days not divisible by six, I've had to figure out what to do. I'd been experimenting with fasting. Hunger comes and goes, though there are also feelings like wanting or expecting to eat that aren't hunger. One of the things I value most about fasting is the self-awareness it brings. Also learning about being human. Also resilience and independence. I recommend…

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Why I stretch

I stretch every day after I meditate in the morning (neck and shoulders) and in my morning and evening calisthenics (quads, Achilles, hamstring, etc). At times I work other stretches in. Why do I stretch? The research I know says it doesn't reduce injury, make me stronger, or enable me to do things otherwise. Yet I find value. It looks like I'm pulling on muscles, tendons, ligaments, or whatever gets stretched. I don't stretch to lengthen the muscle or ligament from pulling on it. While pulling on it creates tension, I don't stretch to create tension. I pull on it to find where I'm tensing it without realizing, so I can relax. Step one is to pull to find where I'm tensing. That step creates…

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Pleasantly surprised by my own success: People choosing to avoid flying for their own reasons

For some time I've been saying, half-jokingly, to people who start showing an interest in more sustainability with me: "Be careful spending time with me or you may find yourself avoiding flying and telling me how much it improves your life not to fly." I don't want to overstate things since only a few people have said it so far, but increasingly people are saying just that sentiment to me. More than one have decided to stop flying altogether. Others are cutting way down. Most importantly, they're doing it to improve their lives, partly to enjoy their worlds more and partly to enjoy their relationships more, but I think mainly out of compassion with and connection to all people everywhere who would suffer for their…

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We can’t turn off our emotional systems and we all share the same emotions.

I've held off on writing this post since I think some people may misunderstand me. My goal is to help raise self-awareness. NYU has posted posters like this one all over campus. I think they are mostly responding to the Israel-Hamas situation, though could apply to others. I grew up not learning much about emotions or making myself aware of them. Leadership classes in business school moved me to increase my self-awareness, by which I mean consciously being aware of what emotions I feel in a given moment and how the human emotional system works. I've found improving this self-awareness among my life's greatest improvements. I consider it a big part of maturation. As best I can tell, our emotional systems all share the same…

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35 Years Ago Today: Global Warming was front page news on the New York Times. Maybe Exxon knew. From then on, YOU DID TOO.

On June 24, 1988, the New York Times posted in its front page: Global Warming Has Begun, Expert Tells Senate You can say corporations and governments hid the problem from us, but not after June 24, 1988. From then on, we had no excuse to say we didn't know. We already knew of habitat loss, deforestation, plastic pollution, and tons of other problems. I'm curious, though. What are your excuses for not acting, even though they don't hold water? Why still cling to them? You'll feel better when you stop buying packaged food, air conditioning all the time, living in a bigger home than you need, and so on.

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Which is worse: litter, air, water, noise, or light pollution?

I've been trying to decide which pollution is worst. I pick up litter daily so I participate actively with it. Have you picked up litter regularly? When I do, I can't help speculate what in a person's mind and heart led them to decide putting a given piece of litter where they did. It leads me to see a dark and selfish part of humanity. That people claim not to connect their litter with the world drowning in it . . . How else can I put it? They're acting stupid. Air and water pollution are similar, just less tangible. Still, even on clear days, looking to the horizon in New York City, I see the air's yellow-brown tinge, and New York City doesn't rank…

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Why sustainability is so hard for you and polluting so easy, from the movie Requiem For a Dream

This post is part 4 in a series including Part 1: What you’ll get more of when you stop polluting: what you love most Part 2: Martin Scorcese on our relationship with pollution Part 3: Why sustainability is so hard and polluting so easy, from the moving Trainspotting I'm continuing today the artistic representations of "What you fear losing when you stop an addiction is exactly what you'll gain" or "You tell me what you fear losing when you stop polluting and I'll tell you what you'll gain" have simplified how I understand and express the emotional terrain people live in and have to navigate to act more sustainably. I posted about how Martin Scorcese in Goodfellas effectively represented how we feel about our lives…

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Why sustainability is so hard and polluting so easy, from the moving Trainspotting

This post is part 3 in a series including Part 1: What you’ll get more of when you stop polluting: what you love most Part 2: Martin Scorcese on our relationship with pollution Part 4: Why sustainability is so hard for you and polluting so easy, from the movie Requiem For a Dream "What you fear losing when you stop an addiction is exactly what you'll gain" or "You tell me what you fear losing when you stop polluting and I'll tell you what you'll gain" have simplified how I understand and express the emotional terrain people live in and have to navigate to act more sustainably. I posted about how Martin Scorcese in Goodfellas effectively represented how we feel about our lives while polluting:…

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I couldn’t make most people feel shame or guilt about sustainability. They’re already feeling so much, I couldn’t add more.

People don't like feeling guilt, shame, insecurity, helplessness, hopelessness, and other emotions that they often feel when sustainability and the environment come up. The emotions arise from what I found Abraham Lincoln said best: "Nothing is more damaging to you than to do something you believe is wrong." Doing something you believe is wrong will make you feel guilt, shame, and so on. People spend so much of their time denying and suppressing these emotions, they come to believe they aren't feeling them all the time. When someone brings up the topic, they become consciously aware of the emotions they already felt but tried to deny and suppress. They feel something like, "I didn't feel shame before this person brought up the environment. I feel…

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Racism, sexism, and the environment: why do people act on two but make excuses about the third?

The problems of racism, sexism, and environmental degradation existed before we were born. They will persist after we die. I've never heard anyone say about racism that they'd like to help but individual action won't solve it so they might as well keep doing racist things, that only governments and corporations can solve it so they shouldn't try, or that if we don't keep pursuing on racist paths we might revert to the Stone Age so we should keep doing racist things. I've never heard anyone say about sexism that they'd like to help but individual action won't solve it so they might as well keep doing sexist things, that only governments and corporations can solve it so they shouldn't try, or that if we…

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Meditation: Thoughts aren’t just ideas that arise and pass away. Each wants to hook you.

Meditation instructors often talk about thoughts arising and passing away in consciousness, as if they just come out of nowhere and go to nowhere. I've found otherwise. No part of your mind is superfluous. The human brain uses up too much energy for evolution to allow unnecessary parts to persist. Each part does something that helped your ancestors survive and pass their genes on to you. For example, some part of your brain interprets things that could look like faces to be faces, whether you want it to or not. So when face-like things enter your field of vision, that part of the brain puts a face into your consciousness. All parts of your brain, when activated, speak up into your consciousness when prompted that…

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Brief thoughts on the question/koan “who am I?”

Regular readers know one of my sidchas is meditating, which I've done for over a decade and regularly for years. I've posted about it lately. I've used a few different techniques over the years. Sometimes I use koans. One is Who am I? sometimes What am I? I also often examine consciousness, which is oddly both all of what we experience and slippery to get a hold of. Asking who I am while exploring consciousness, independent of thoughts, emotions, memories, senses, and other contents of my mind leads to other questions I found curious enough to repeat here. I hope the subtle differences of meaning aren't lost to readers. They aren't supposed to sound trippy, but reflective. They're not meaningless or pointless questions. Each is…

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Fifty-one

Different people define middle age differently, but having just turned 51 I think I'm in it by all definitions. Physical My first sense of my body physically declining came in my early thirties, when my potential to compete in ultimate began to decline. Before then, I always felt motivation to practice since I knew the next year my potential would be higher. After then, no matter how much I practiced, my potential would decrease the next year, which decreased my motivation to practice. Over the years, the physical decline continued. The biggest included the time to heal from injury and recover from hard workouts. In my second-to-last summer playing summer league I didn't play to be the best on my team, then in my early…

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Two questions nobody has ever answered and what to do about them.

How about a change of tone from my usual? Do you ever think about what consciousness is? Or why there's something, as in the whole universe, rather than nothing? I don't mean in some trippy way, or superficial like college freshmen talking about philosophy in the dorm hallway. These two questions, in various forms, have interested people since before history, but as best I can tell, no one has made any progress whatsoever: One question is: What is consciousness? In other forms: why do I sense thoughts that seem to have no tangible reality, yet feel as real as any physical sensation that all other humans seem to have, but I can't sense theirs in the slightest? Do animals have consciousness? Does anything else in…

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Health and longevity of other cultures
Affluence Without Abundance, by James Suzman

Health and longevity of other cultures

We tend to think we live in the most free, healthiest, longest-living, most egalitarian, most stable culture humans have ever had. In some cases, yes, but in others, it turns out otherwise. It seems we project onto other times and cultures what will make us feel better about our own. I like feeling good about myself, but an inaccurate view keeps me from improving my situation. I want to understand where we stand more accurately so I'm compiling relevant data and sources. I'll start with a few and add more as I come across them. Preindustrial workers worked fewer hours than today's, MIT: One of capitalism's most durable myths is that it has reduced human toil. This myth is typically defended by a comparison of…

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Do addicts get less of what they think they get more of?

I've noticed a trend in addiction. I wonder if anyone out there is an expert or knows. I tried looking up the pattern, but didn't find anything. Have you heard of the pattern? The pattern Every addiction involves a pleasure. Gambling makes some people feel like a winner. Alcohol makes some people feel social. Social media makes you feel connected. Sugar tastes sweet. Heroin makes you feel euphoria. Each pleasure is unique. The giving you an intense but short peak, it seems to me that addiction overall decreases exactly the pleasure the addict wants and thinks he or she is getting more of. They get less of it. Gambling addicts feel like winners, but actually lose money. Alcoholics feel social, but the people they meet…

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How to stay not depressed when living not how society tells you to

Living sustainably is easy. All humans did for most of human history. Animals do it. Living differently than everyone else can be hard, even when you live how they want. People push hard against people who remind them they aren't living by their values. Alison, the host of This Sustainable Life: Untethered, wrote to ask me how I handled the challenge around the time she wrote a post, The Diary Of An Addict, sharing the dawning of her of how much her life revolved around craving out of her control. She wrote: Have you heard of the Kubler Ross change curve? It outlines the emotional journey from starting a new project or change and the different phases that you inevitably go through.  I feel like…

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There is an ‘I’, it’s just not who you think it is.

Life poses two questions people have probably asked for thousands of years that I've seen zero progress in answering from any source: Why does reality exist?What is consciousness? Or, alternatively, why is there a sense of "me" or "I" that seems to exist outside reality? Regarding the first question, I can't imagine any way of finding an answer using the tools within reality. It's weird to ask or even conceive to ask "why is there anything?". But today I want to write about the second question. As far as I can tell, some time in the past, no humans existed and no consciousness existed. Some time farther back, no life existed, so I'm confident believing no consciousness like human consciousness existed. Somehow it came to…

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