“Dude. Why don’t you take people’s numbers / email addresses?” At a video shoot last week, three people told me they wanted to follow up with me so I gave them my contact information. Immediately after the event, I wrote in my calendar to follow up, following my habit, “Schedule your follow-up when you email!” which I apply beyond email connections. After not hearing from them, I wrote my friend[…] Keep reading →

Continuing my series of alternative responses to the New York Times column, The Ethicists, looking at the consequences of one’s actions instead of imposing values on others, here is my take on today’s post, “Can I Wear Jewelry If I Don’t Support Its Origins?” When my mother passed away, I inherited an antique necklace made of carved ivory beads. I love the look of — and am sentimentally tied to —[…] Keep reading →

“He’s so lucky! He never puts on weight!” “She’s so lucky! She loses weight so fast!” I hear people say things like that all the time. If I eat one unhealthy meal, I can see it on my belly. But then even after running a marathon I don’t see that fat go away. Fat goes on immediately and takes a long time and a lot of work to get off.[…] Keep reading →

Yesterday I saw yet another of countless articles showing how the U.S. government’s strategy on drugs promotes drug use, crime, government spending that decreases quality of life, etc. You’ve read the article in many formats before. This one’s headline was “Federal Drug Sentencing Laws Bring High Cost, Low Return: Penalty increases enacted in 1980s and 1990s have not reduced drug use or recidivism.” Sound familiar? You probably responded, “Yeah, in[…] Keep reading →

“I’m offended by what you say!” “I’m outraged” People say things like this all the time. People who say things like that write a lot of opinion pieces in the media. I think they’re trying to communicate: “You did something wrong and I have the right to change you.” That’s not what they’re saying, despite their intent. They’re telling you their emotional state. That’s all. To the extent people prefer[…] Keep reading →

I just clicked send. My friend John is going to edit the article. When he sends it back I can submit it. I don’t have to think about it because I’ll know to act when I get his email. Have you ever missed a deadline this way? Or lost contact with someone? Or worried about when you’d hear back? Or forgotten about something important? Relying on your memory for following[…] Keep reading →

“What do I say to a 99-year-old woman?” “What do I say to a famous person?” “What do I say to someone who could help my career without seeming selfish?” All I could think to ask was what it’s like to be 99, which seemed irrelevant and the same question people have asked her for a decade. I don’t like when people find out I don’t eat meat and ask[…] Keep reading →

What do say about yourself when you’ve hung out with half a dozen Presidents of the United States, won a Presidential Medal of Freedom, learned from Peter Drucker, been called the best leader in the world by CEOs of Fortune 100 companies, befriended four-star Generals, and things like that? Do you keep it to yourself, as modesty would suggest? How do you mention those things without bragging, or sounding like[…] Keep reading →

Continuing my series of alternative responses to the New York Times column, The Ethicists, looking at the consequences of one’s actions instead of imposing values on others, here is my take on today’s post, “Handling a Racist Remark in the Workplace.” I represent a real-estate developer in Florida. Recently an employee of one of the developer’s commercial tenants confided to me that he overheard an administrator at his company tell another[…] Keep reading →